Moving for the 8th time in 8 years!

Oh yes it's true. :) Just when I thought I would break my move-every-year-streak our Apartment folk jacked the rent up so out we are! Amanda and I will be moving close to down town Southern Pines and I am so excited! Its a quiet small complex and its beautiful. It will be a nice change of scenery and obviously I like change so I will enjoy arranging my room differently in a new location! Pictures to come!

I just moved for the 7th time in 7 years :)

If anyone is reading this, which is doubtful considering I haven't posted in 10 months, I moved last weekend! :) Yay! I am going to be living with one of my closest friends from college, Amanda, in Aberdeen. This is most convenient considering I work there and my church is there.

I am still trying to figure out what to do about graduate school stuff. I have pretty much resolved that I do desire to go and therefore do plan on going. So, with those decisions behind me the rest will be easy, right? ha. Oh the plight of the indecisive decision maker.

I do not want to get my Masters in education for the sake of redundancy. I do need to get it in something the public school system would recognize as worthy of a pay increase though. Some of the things I have considered include, Teaching English as a Second Language, Linguistics, Intercultural Studies, Urban Cultural Studies, etc.

Something that comes with making that decision (which I am allowing myself to take a few years to make) :), is trying to decide if I should keep it local and head on to NC State or follow a dream up to Wheaton, IL.

I do love the school I teach in and have resolved that I will never teach under a better principal. Mike Metcalf is really the most considerate and effective leader a school could ask for. I am very blessed that the Lord opened up a place for me at this school. Actually, if it wasn't for Dr. Metcalf I probably would have never taught again. Leaving this school would be a difficult decision to make.

I am also a part of a local church body, Sandhills Presbyterian Church, which I love. We are getting a new pastor next month and his two awesome daughters are involved with the youth, where I volunteer. My small group has blessed me with some pretty great friendships.

The point of this post was to update you guys on whats been going on with me, but ultimately I just want to say that the Lord is Good. A year ago I was never going to teach again and now I am certain it is the job for me. Only the Lord could have changed my heart and He did! He also provided amazing friends, a place to live, and and wonderful local body for me to be a part of. I am thankful for His grace!

And the final...

of the three part posting series... MAKE SURE you check out the other two. Hit up that Country Roads video too, hot stuff!

Life.

Well, let me just start by saying that I think in all things we have the temptation to find the negative and the opportunity to find the positive. I am thankful for my new job starting Thursday and I am thankful for attending seminary and studying Greek.

I am a little overwhelmed. So please pray for me. :) Really do. You don't even have to tell me are, just pray. I am convinced that is what has kept me going thus far and what will carry me continually-the cries of the saints! Greek doubled in its difficulty at class this weekend and I am feeling a little frantic about learning all this info in time to turn in my hw on Wednesday. Whew. God is faithful. He will do it. Just pray that I will be diligent and not discouraged and that I will be a beast on the books this week especailly before I start this job.

Also about the job. That I will do it well, that it won't be too much or too overwhelming and that I can build encouraging and positive relationships with my students and co-workers quickly. I think it will kind of be a shock to my system to be in a new school (I have only taught in one professionally), and to have to start all over with new staff and new kids. Exciting-but scary too.

I want to leave you guys with some words that I find pretty comforting and really well describing things I have been pondering lately. This is from a devotional by this dude named Fenelon-The Seeking Heart. He is a really cool dude, you guys should check him out sometime if you haven't before.

"You have some difficult trials to bear but you need them since God has allowed these events to happen. He knows how to select them. You could not have picked for yourself what God brings into your life through the cross. The cross that you would pick out would build your self-will instead of breaking it down.

There are times when everything in life seems to be a trial. Sometimes there is only suffering. Still, the heaviest cross must be carried in peace. Sometimes the cross can neither be carried or dragged. Then you can only fall down beneath it, overwhelmed and exhausted. I pray that God may spare you from suffering as much as possible. [These were written as letters to a friend]

Remember that God is not unaware of your suffering. He allows your suffering. See that He alone knows what is best for you. Live by faith as you embrace your trials. Confidently trust in God, even when you do not see what He is doing. Trust that God, with great compassion, gives you trials in proportion to the help that He wants to bring to you. There is no doubt that the life of faith is the most penetrating of all deaths.

You complain about your inward darkness and poverty of spirit. Jesus says, 'Blessed are the poor in spirit.' It is good for you to see your weakness, but don't excuse it. Remain simple and low before God, and He will bring you peace, gentleness, longsuffering, and contentment even in your trouble."

This is a devotional well worth purchasing. I love you friends. If you made it through all three in my series, please do post and let me know! :)

Timber!

:) Welcome to our home. So aparently, a few weeks ago, the neighbors HUUUUUGE tree was struck by lightning. I mean this tree is massive. The tree is so big that it hangs or (hung I should say) over our house and their house which are atleast 4 or 5 car lengths apart. On Friday night one of the branches split and fell off into our yard on the side of our garage and across the entire span of our front yard. That was just a branch. The tree in its enormity (I would say a good 2/3) is still standing. Tomorrow they are coming to take the whole thing down because it is so unstable, it could actually fall on our house tonight, land right on my room, and keep me from ever writting a blog again!

Also, our whole garage will probably have to be re-done. Although nothing inside was damaged and it didn't cave in, a structural beam was taken out and so was part of the roof and gutters.

Nice. :) Atleast it provides some temporary entertainment, and an extra little exciting place for Winston to pee!

West Virginia

Well, I am about to post about 3 posts in this order
1. Trip to WV
2. Tree on house
3. Life today

West Virginia... I finally got to go to a WVU game. My family has our NC teams and our WV team... I mean there are only 2 to choose from and aparently you can't choose both as my cousins at both respective schools tell me, so by default, we choose WVU-EVEN THOUGH my momma did go to Marshall for a year or two. And then there is that We Are Marshall true story to love and the movie as well.

Anyway, so my uncles are in the grocery business. They get season tickets to all the home WVU games at the beginning of the season from their produce vendor. Nice. My mom's brother, Hudson, has 2 sons currently at WV and 2 in high school on their way to WVU. They go to every game. They normally sit apart but because my mom's uncle-my great uncle Joe who I work for during the summers- hardly ever goes, he offered to give me his tickets and then we could all sit together.

Except... we got the tickets and his were different. We were already in nice seats- lower level row 35ish around the 38 yard line! woot! But his tickets were in the same section row 10!!! So, since Hudson and one of his sons and I all drove up together from Charleston that day we went ahead and sat in their normal seats. I didn't care much, I needed a lot of help understanding everything thats going on (even though I have been watching football for 24 years) and I enjoy their company. When my other two cousins got there that attend WVU, we gave them the tickets uncle Joe gave me and watched them proceed down to row ten, and keep walking over and over and over and over closer and close to the 50 and sure enough, home boys were on the 49 yard line! Woot! Uncle Joe and the hook ups. I call him the Lebanease Mafia-party of 1. He is a thriving business man at the age of 83. I love my family... :)


The Stadium


Uncle Hudson-he is so hard core. He was listening play by play on the radio. So every time there was something in question or a flag was thrown, he was our man!


Damon-youngest of the 4 and of the 9 grandkids- other wise known as my "Dae Dae" boy. My dad gave him that nick name when he was like 4, no one knows why. He hated it until I started calling him that. Now its his trademark. What I do for these people...


Ryan-who is the eldest of the 4 boys- follows me in the 9 grandkid line up. He is a senior-ish at WVU and is looking at starting a really cool clothes business. I'm sure I'll post more on that later! :)


Sean-next in the line up after Ryan. He is a sophmore at WVU and currently the best on the grill of our generation :)


Me! In my WVU attire. Aparently, no one felt it important to tell me that you are actually supposed to wear yellow/gold instead of blue to the game so that the stadium looks uniform. Thanks fam. :)


Okay, so let me know if this video does/doesn't work. At the end of the WVU game the large majority of the peeps hang out and sing "country roads" :). I thought you guys my appreciate this cultural experience.

:) An Announcement

I have a job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wooooohoooooo!

I am officially a reading tutor for a middle school in Aberdeen, NC.

Typical

So, I have been looking forward to today since Monday when I picked up my substitute packet from Central Office. I could not go get my TB test until Wednesday, which meant that I couldn't get it read until today, so I could not turn in my packet until today. SO, Winston and I both have been anticipating FRIDAY!

Well, last night I went for a jog and rolled my ankle so that put me out for the rest of last night, but hey, that's okay, it wasn't gonna keep me down.

This morning I woke up, got ready, dressed up to get the ball rolling and sure enough my cursed car was full of what...the single most disgusting thing on the face of the planet which I am most afraid of... ANTS YES YOU HEARD ME ANTS! Needless to say, we have had an ant problem in our yard for atleast a week or so pointed out by the lawn man last week... my fathers reply "we will take care of it later..." and so, now, the little jokers have found there way into my car.

I thought it was just a few so I start killing them with my hands, I couldn't find the source(note: with ants, there is ALWAYS a source). Finally I traced them back to the single most difficult place to reach in the car- in between the car seat and the middle consul thing. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! NOT TODAY REALLY?!?! I really did not want to proceed with all this sub stuff until the ant stuff was taken care of because I didn't want ants crawling all over me as I drove around and went into get my TB thing checked and turn in my sub stuff. I wouldn't hire someone who looked like they had a personal infestation of ants.

SO, here I am, sweating in my dress clothes outside thinking that I would just use my parents vacuum instead of spending all those quarters and vacuum those suckers and be on my way. But then I realized that if I used my parent's vacuum, they would eventually come OUT of the vacuum and possibly into our home, which would another nightmare from last year re-lived. So I decided to bust open my mom's change holder thing and get some quarters and be on my way.

So, I go to the vacuum place and start vacuuming and vacuuming and I think I must have vacuumed that bad boy for an hour, really I spent like a trillion dollars worth of quarters, so much that I had to go in and cash in some dollars to get more. When I ran out of quarters the first time I was actually almost done and then they started to re-surface again. So, I got more quarters and went back at it.

By this time I am trenched in sweat because its hot as the dickens, so I have now decided that I would go to the store (Harris Teeter NOT Wal Mart) and get some ant traps and kill those jerks dead, then go home, cool down, eat lunch take a shower, and do it all over again.

SO, I have now adequately placed 4 ant traps in my car, along with completely saturating the carpet with ant kill spray stuff. Hopefully, I will not die as well when I get back in there because there was a foggy humid mist in there when I left.

When I was talking on the phone with Amanda trying to blow off the steam about this, I said, "You know I'M JUST TRYING TO GET A JOB FOR CRYING OUT LOUD," as she laughed she was very sympathetic. I wasn't offended, she was laughing because she was in agreement that this was completely TYPICAL of something that would happen to me.

So, now I feel a little better after posting this, blowing off a little more steam as I pound these sticky keys and backspace five times for every 10 keys I type. Whew.

Have a great Friday folks! :)

My Old New Friend, Winston

Winston after a Bath



Squeaky clean Winston


So, I am living in Laurinburg right now with my parents. This has been a pretty humbling experience after being out of the house for 6 years and on my own completely for the past 2. Its hard to be home during the days and spend them all searching every day for jobs. I have decided to sub. I think this is really going to be whats best for me-flexible schedule to go back and forth to Charlotte and good pay if you are a certified teacher-at least good pay compared to the minimum wadge alternative.

So, the days get kinda sad sitting around waiting for things to pick up. But then there is Winston. A little dog my sister and I picked up off the side of the highway a few years ago and gave to my mother a week after her dog of 13 years died. He was such a companion for her since my father was working out of town during the weeks.

And now, two years later the little sweet fellow is quite a companion for me, keeping my days enjoyable and not so lonesome. We play fetch and he loves to go outside and chase the neighbors cats. He gets really worked up about going out to make sure they aren't in our bushes or on our porch. He goes to check the mail with me and wants me to hang out with him outside to watch him sun bathe.

I know it sounds silly, but he has really been a joy to have around, while I have been waiting for this job stuff.

So, that's Winston. :)

The American Dream- rotting our country away one soul at a time.

So, my dear friend informs me that a senator at the Democratic National Convention tonight made a statement about the American Dream fading and also said that we need to get it back or something along those lines.

The American Dream makes me want to vomit.

Take my family for example (the Lebanese side, *beaming with pride :)*)... My great grandparents came here from Lebanon in the early 1900s. They came here poor and my great grandfather traveled all around West Virginia on horse back selling things as a pioneer. At some point soon after he married my great grandmother, he opened his own general store. The whole family sacrificed things to keep this store going-my grandmother, her own college education to stay home and help with the store. As my grandmothers generation grew up it was time for them to take over and all the men opened a chain of grocery stores that grew throughout three states. They eventually sold the chain and retired young and well off none the less. So. The American Dream, there you have it.

But you know something interesting...everyone dies sometime. Now, I do realize this sounds morbid, but, its true. So, whether you die a millionaire or a hundred-dollars in-my-bank-account-aire, we still all come to the same point-death.

Does a wealthy life and nice cars and nice house and nice clothes cushion us from experiencing pain and sorrow? Maybe in some regards. But in what matters, what really matters, the soul... of course not.

Actually, interestingly enough, I have been spending some time lately reading the book of Mark. Every time I read the Gospels, I am reminded of the people Jesus hung out with the most- sinners, sick, lowly, outcast, tax collectors, poor. Now here's whats really interesting- yes, Jesus did minister to these people by meeting their immediately needs many times, but what was His greatest concern? THE HEART! WORSHIP! He wants us to KNOW Him, to drink from the fountain that will never cause you to thirst again.

I am anti-American dream because its the wrong dream. It's a lie. It never satisfies. If you retire at 60 years old and go sailing across the world and have in-home health care and lots of drugs to ease the pain of aging, you still have your soul. What will you do when you have all that free time to think... think about all the things that still haunt you that you have never come to terms with. Who will take care of that for you? Not even the best shrink for the most money can even start to take off the edge. American dream isn't gonna do it. What about the loss of a wife or a child? American dream?-nope. What about the marital affair that you were involved in or that was committed against you? Will the American Dream ease that pain?-don't think so. What about rape? What about broken relationships with parents or children who won't even speak to their parents, what then?...

The point is not that it's bad to have material things, its just seeking our comfort in our material security is empty. If we seek our comfort in material security what happens when it all disappears? When the company goes bankrupt? When to stock market crashes? What happens when the house catches on fire? When you have a master's degree and can't get a job? Where will the comfort come from?

EMPTY. There is no gold at the end of that rainbow...Take heed. If you are chasing that American Dream just as hard as you can, one day you will realize (hopefully sooner than later) that there is NO gold pot waiting for you on the other side. It is an empty ugly truth friends. Masters Degree or GED, 1 Million bucks or a hundred- those standards have no weight on a person's worth or significance.

Now the right dream... to be loved, to be accepted, to be freed, forgiven, to be comforted, to be restored, renewed, satisfied but hungry for more-yet given more upon that hunger.

Jesus was a lover. His time on earth was for the soul purpose of reconciling man to God. The list above are all things that are found in the lives of those who's hope is in Him alone.

Its as simple as selling everything that you have and following Him. So tell me, if that is true (the Bible and the fact that He told that rich young ruler to sell all his possessions and he would be able to follow Christ) what do you think Jesus would say about the American Dream?

Let me end with this. **I am NOT anti-America**. I am incredibly thankful for religious freedom and for all the other liberties that we daily forget about in this country. I am just against supporting a man made idea of what supposedly should be our end goal in life. The American dream is in fact bondage-being bound to pursuing after this unattainable mark- never having enough, always wanting more-NEVER satisfied.

My end goal is redemption-to be delivered from this body, and to be restored to a new creation- forgiven and loved. That certainly won't be happening on Vera Bradley's dime or by sporting the latest SUV.